All At Once

I need to know that this feeling will pass. That maybe one day i'll wake up and not think of you. Not even a little. I'll be able to get through a conversation without thinking he always said that. I'll have my insomnia without having to wonder whether or not you're awake. I'll hear my message tone and my mind and heart doesn't jump hoping it's from you. I won't remember things you've said when i'm where we were. I won't think of you when i'm reading poems or doing english literature. I won't remember all the corny things you've said just because you had to say it. It's taken a long time but it's finally fading. A big part of me is so relieved. But there will always be that little part of me that will want to remember. I'm getting there. It's so close now. But i'm starting to doubt whether or not it's what i really want.